Present 

Here and accounted for, although only one other person is, and she didn’t know who I was. I decided to Uber in on the first day just to make sure I was on time. I was 20 minutes early because I’m contraflow traffic to the office. Bliss. It really only does take 20 minutes, and I was out the door by 8:15. I got here first and there was no coffee made, so I made it.

Oops.

That was the first mistake. Not knowing how much coffee to use. You could stand a spoon up straight, but with enough CoffeeMate and sugar, it’s tolerable. As an added bonus, I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep until Thursday.

This is so exciting. People are starting to walk in and I’m doing the classic “hi, I’m Leslie. I’m new here” patois. So far, everyone has been young and in jeans. I am in black dockers, a Smithsonian t-shirt, and my Ralph Lauren striped sweater (the go-to when I don’t know what to wear). I’m also wearing red patent leather Dansko knockoffs I got at Payless. All in all, a great outfit but doesn’t necessarily fit in.

Maybe I was born to stand out. Here’s hopin.’

Praying for myself to be calm, cool, collected- and able to pass on my excitement to others without being a total spazzbasket. Tomorrow I think I will wear jeans and Chuck Taylors. However, you only get one shot to look good in your ID picture, if they put a picture on it.

There’s a Christmas tree in the lobby, so whenever I get nervous, I look at it and start intentionally waiting for the baby… kind of like that classic therapist image of trying to quiet a candle in your mind.

Between waiting for the baby and waiting for someone to show up that knows who I am, expectation is all around.

Amen.