Leopardstown

Daily writing prompt

How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals?

I wanted to go to Ireland to see Microsoft in Dublin while I was over there. Get a feel for it because I think that’s a trajectory that could conceivably happen. I want to get into the EU somewhere, and that’s a good start. But it has to be the right job, because without scaffolding, I will not succeed. A better option would be a contract with Microsoft Press, because then I’m basically on my own.

I couldn’t go to Ireland because it was not safe. It was a sensory carnival in which I couldn’t be in control of anything. By the time it was presented to me, the trip had already been planned as multi-city, a pace in which I would almost certainly regret once I got there.

The choice I made was to housesit for my dad while he and Lindsay go all over the UK and Ireland in a flash. It’s not about them. It’s about me. I know for sure that ADHD makes things sound attractive and then my autism says “absolutely not.” If people think I’m difficult here, try dropping all the context around me, watching me struggle, and still insisting that I should push through and I’ll be absolutely fine.

I am 48 years old. No one will ever “talk me into anything” ever again.

So I chose easy instead of exciting. I’m not going to see Microsoft. Dublin can wait.