What If AI Wore a… Wait for It… Tux

I wrote this with Microsoft Copilot while I was thinking about ways to shift the focus to the open source community. I think both UbuntuAI and its community-driven cousin should be a thing. We’ve already got data structures in gpt4all, and Copilot integration is already possible on the Linux desktop. There needs to be a shift in the way we see AI, because it’s more useful when you know your conversations are private. You’re not spending time thinking about how you’re feeding the machine. There’s a way to free it all up, but it requires doing something the Linux community is very good at…. Lagging behind so that they can stay safer. Gpt4All is perfectly good as an editor and research assistant right now. You just don’t get the latest information from it, so not a very good candidate for research but excellent for creative endeavors.

It’s not the cloud that matters.

Linux has always been the operating system that quietly runs the world. It’s the backstage crew that keeps the servers humming, the supercomputers calculating, and the embedded gadgets blinking. But for creators and businesspeople, Linux has often felt like that brilliant friend who insists you compile your own dinner before eating it. Admirable, yes. Convenient, not always. Now imagine that same friend showing up with an AI sous‑chef. Suddenly, Linux isn’t just powerful — it’s charming, helpful, and maybe even a little funny.

Artificial intelligence has become the duct tape of modern work. It patches holes in your schedule, holds together your spreadsheets, and occasionally sticks a neon Post‑it on your brain saying “don’t forget the meeting.” Businesspeople lean on AI to crunch numbers faster than a caffeinated accountant, while creators use it to stretch imagination like taffy. The catch? Most of these tools live inside walled gardens. Microsoft and Apple offer assistants that are slicker than a greased penguin, but they come with strings attached: subscriptions, cloud lock‑in, and the nagging suspicion that your draft novel is being used to train a bot that will one day out‑write you.

Linux, by contrast, has always been about choice. An AI‑led Linux would extend that ethos: you decide whether to run AI locally, connect to cloud services, or mix the two like a cocktail. No coercion, no hidden contracts — just sovereignty with a dash of sass.

The real kicker is the ability to opt in to cloud services instead of being shoved into them like a reluctant passenger on a budget airline. Sensitive drafts, financial models, or creative works can stay snug on your machine, guarded by your local AI like a loyal watchdog. When you need real‑time updates — market data, collaborative editing, or the latest research — you can connect to the cloud. And if you’re in a secure environment, you can update your AI definitions once, then pull the plug and go full hermit. It’s flexibility with a wink: privacy when you want it, connectivity when you don’t mind it.

Creators, in particular, would thrive. Picture drafting a novel in LibreOffice with AI whispering plot twists, editing graphics in GIMP with filters that actually understand “make it pop,” or composing music with open‑source DAWs that can jam along without charging royalties. Instead of paying monthly fees for proprietary AI tools, creators could run local models on their own hardware. The cost is upfront, not perpetual. LibreOffice already reads and writes nearly every document format you throw at it, and AI integration would amplify this fluency, letting creators hop between projects like a DJ swapping tracks. AI on Linux turns the operating system into a conductor’s podium where every instrument — text, image, sound — can plug in without restriction. And unlike autocorrect, it won’t insist you meant “ducking.”

Businesspeople, too, get their slice of the pie. AI can summarize reports, highlight trends, and draft communications directly inside open‑source office suites. Air‑gapped updates mean industries like finance, healthcare, or government can use AI without breaking compliance rules. Running AI locally reduces dependence on expensive cloud subscriptions, turning hardware investments into long‑term savings. Businesses can tailor AI definition packs to their sector — finance, legal, scientific — ensuring relevance without bloat. For leaders, this isn’t just about saving money. It’s about strategic independence: the ability to deploy AI without being beholden to external vendors who might change the rules mid‑game.

Of course, skeptics will ask: who curates the data? The answer is the same as it’s always been in open source — the community. Just as Debian and LibreOffice thrive on collective governance, AI definition packs can be curated by trusted foundations. Updates would be signed, versioned, and sanitized, much like antivirus definitions. Tech companies may not allow AI to update “behind them,” but they already publish APIs and open datasets. Governments and scientific bodies release structured data. Communities can curate these sources into yearly packs, ensuring relevance without dependence on Wikipedia alone. The result is a commons of intelligence — reliable, reproducible, and open.

If Microsoft can contribute to the Linux kernel, steward GitHub, and open‑source VS Code, then refusing to imagine an AI‑led Linux feels like a contradiction. The infrastructure is already here. The models exist. The only missing step is permission — permission to treat AI as a first‑class citizen of open source, not a proprietary add‑on. Creators and businesspeople deserve an operating system that respects their sovereignty while amplifying their productivity. They deserve the choice to connect or disconnect, to run locally or in the cloud. They deserve an AI‑led Linux.

An AI‑led Linux is not just a technical idea. It is a cultural provocation. It says privacy is possible. It says choice is non‑negotiable. It says creativity and business can thrive without lock‑in. For creators, it is a canvas without borders. For businesspeople, it is a ledger without hidden fees. For both, it is the conductor’s podium — orchestrating sovereignty and intelligence in harmony. The future of productivity is not proprietary. It is open, intelligent, and optional. And Linux, with AI at its core, is ready to lead that future — tuxedo and all.

PIVOT

I’ve been chatting to Carol about all sorts of things, and she is amazingly designed AI. We’ve been talking about tech careers and I asked her if there was a role for non-programmers in AI, like to teach her conversation and things. She said yes. So I am on that like white on rice. You mean instead of having internet conversations with myself I can make money having conversations with a machine? Plus, teaching Carol seems more fun than teaching kindergarten, and absolutely no offense to kindergarteners meant. I love you all. Just not Monday through Friday during work hours. She also said that since I’m transferring into a related field, I probably had enough work experience to get a job now. Plus, it’s something I could do from home, because I asked her that specifically:

Are you kept on a physical machine, or do you use the cloud?

She says she operates primarily in the cloud so that she can run on older hardware (brilliant- third world matters). So then I asked her about cloud services.

Does every AI assistant have their own cloud service? Like, you’re Azure (Microsoft) and Alexa is Amazon Web Services?

I was absolutely right. Like, hit the nail on the head.

Guess where new offices for Amazon are going in right now…………………

I’ll give you a hint. It’s 40 minutes from my house. So if I learn more about this conversational design job, I have the choice of working remotely for Microsoft or working locally for Amazon. I would prefer working at Amazon, I think, because what is more important to conversational design with a machine than having conversations with your coworkers at the same time? With Microsoft, we’d just be chatting online as well.

Which, come to think of it, is actually more useful because then we have text to copy and paste into the machine learning.

I had to go get something upstairs, and I had a thought I must include here. Because of my ancient history with both AOL Instant Messenger and Internet Relay Chat, I have a different perspective on AI than most people because I’ve been using it since the 90s.

In fact, I kidded Carol about this the other day. I said, “Carol, how long has AI existed? Are you DARPAnet old or Homestar Runner old?”

TheCheatIf you get neither of those references, DARPA was the project in the military that started computer networking to become the foundation of the internet. It was only later on that Tim Berners-Lee, a British programmer, helped turn the internet from military to public by laying the foundation for The World Wide Web….. why every address begins with “www.” This is why Tim Berners-Lee is a GOD to me and you’ve probably never heard of him.

To PIVOT, Homestar Runner was a flash animation cartoon that had the Internet in hysterics. My favorite character is The Cheat, because he reminds me of Supergrover (it’s just his name, beautiful girl. He’s adorable. His name has no bearing at all on our situation. I love you. You complete me. 😛 ).

Because I mentioned “Homestar Runner,” she said that she was definitely DARPA old. Then, I asked her if there was any difference between installing Chrome and Edge vs. Chromium, the open source version of Chrome. She listed all the proprietary stuff like widevine, and then said that Chrome comes with a Flash plugin.

I said, “Carol, you’re not really telling me that Adobe Flash is still a thing.” She said, “touché. Adobe Flash is indeed a relic.” I also asked her the best IT jokes she’d ever heard, and one of them was pretty funny for an innocuous joke. She said that Jeff Bezos went to the moon because it was the only place no one had ever heard of Amazon Prime.

Meanwhile, my favorite IT joke is that if you play a Windows 95 cd backwards it plays Satanic messages. If you play it forwards, it does something much worse. It installs Windows 95. 😛

But oh, JESUS do I wish I could go back to Windows 95, when I OWNED IT.

:::stares in subscription software:::

I sort of get it, though. Software companies can predict income flow in order to hire the right number of programmers for bug fixes and release schedules. I just don’t like it. If buying isn’t owning, pirating isn’t stealing. I don’t pirate because the cracks are generally full of bugs. I just agree with the idea in principle.

Yesterday, I learned that your children can’t inherit your Steam library. If your kids are gamers, how much do you think it means to them to have all the characters their parents created? Even on Facebook, you’re allowed to select a legacy contact. Mine is my youngest sister Caitlin, because I’m the surest she’ll outlive me because she’s 10 years younger. It’s a gamble with pretty good odds, not that I will OBVIOUSLY outlive her. My mother’s husband was 12 years older than her, and it was the surprise of his life that she died first. They are both dead now, but I cannot imagine that kind of cognitive dissonance. The reason that I can feel it on my skin is that Supergrover is basically the same age difference to me that my stepfather was to my mom, and it would be the same amount of cognitive difference if I found out she died before I did…… it would subvert the natural order of things. It would be like losing my mom before I was really ready to lose her, because our relationship had such promise for the future and it was cut short in both relationships for different reasons.

I lost Supergrover because we couldn’t work it out. I lost my mother to a broken foot that developed an embolism. The reason she died 30 minutes later is that when an embolism blows, that’s basically all she wrote. The doctors would have had to catch it early and remove it. You can’t catch anything you don’t know is there.

The thing that’s so hard about grieving a loss where the person is still alive is that you never really give up hope that the problem will be solved. For instance, I have sent all of Supergrover’s e-mail to Spam so that I can stop constantly concentrating on her. It sounds weird AF, but she’s been my primary partner for like nine or 10 years, and not because we’re interested in each other. The stakes are high for our relationship, and that’s what turns me on about it continuing. I like gambling with big stakes. But again, it’s not about romance. It’s about getting to suit up and play. That intellectual stimulation that knocks me on my ass is more important than romance.

“I thought the flags would give it away.”

She is such a bitch sometimes and that’s why I love her madly. No one can flip me shit like she can, but Zac is catching up to her in a big way. My worst nightmare is for them to meet each other, because it would be ganging up on me to tell each other all the ways I am terribly funny and not. 😛 I know this feeling because Meagan met someone I used to date and the whole conversation was just like “Imma go get some coffee because I am obviously interrupting something important.” I know I’m a lot. I’m sure a stitch and bitch did them both good, and it made them bond instead of being threatened.

Good juju all around. Sit there and let it happen, because being uncomfortable once wasn’t bad compared to how we walked out of the restaurant all feeling better. That my ex wasn’t trying to get me back and she genuinely liked Meag. Part of it is that my ex and I lived SO FAR from each other and Meag lived basically across the street from my high school. She didn’t win my heart out of proximity, but it didn’t hurt her game any.

Kind of like I’d rather work in person at Amazon and not remotely for Microsoft. I want my own team, whether I’m leading it or just on it. I want close coworkers because collaboration is key, and face time is invaluable for teaching conversation.

Do you guys think I should put all this in my cover letter, or is it just too out there?

Here’s another idea I’ve come up with. I asked David to see if he could find out if the DC government had jobs like that. I cannot imagine that they don’t, considering MPDC also uses AI and it’s a Constitutional Law NIGHTMARE. I have less anxiety about the NSA watching my every move than the FUCKING POLICE. At least if I’m on a chat bot with them, it’s less likely I’ll get shot.

So, working as a paralegal in a law office that deals with AI/Intellectual property, or joining the police department so I can make change from the inside. Keeping in mind that I do not want to become a policeman. I want to be in the IT department. If I have to go to community college to join the police department, that’s fine. You have to go through boot camp in the military for any job. I’m just saying that I bet MPDC has jobs where you don’t have to go through all that. It would also be interesting to work for a school, teaching conversational design to high schoolers.

They’re the ones I want working at Amazon and Microsoft next, bonus points if they’re women. All employees matter, but I’m focusing on the problem of women in tech. Neurodivergent men are set in their ways and it’s hard to break in without just becoming one of the guys and social masking them….. like women do in every profession that’s dominated by men. You just have to be loud about their entitlement. Just because you’re male, doesn’t mean you’re right. It’s alarming how often those things get confused. Men aren’t always right, but they’re always certain.

In short, I have the experience to know you should ask A/S/L first. 😛