Come up with a crazy business idea.

I might actually be able to come up with a business idea today because I’m finally back in my body. My anxiety ebbs and flows, and I go into fight or flight easily. I hate when I get into survival mode, because when I’m frustrated and overwhelmed I nitpick. And, since I spend most of my time alone, that means beating up on myself.

If you also have anxiety, you can probably relate to this. The fun house mirror is making small things huge. You can’t let things roll off your back easily. And even today, with all my brain chemicals right, I am still experiencing what feels like tinnitus, except not really in my ears. It’s a weird sensation, but I am out of migraine hell. Therefore, I am not completely comfortable, but I’m not as sick as I was yesterday. I haven’t felt that ill in a long time. What I’m realizing is how blessed I am that they were medication side effects and I do not have a physical malady that makes me feel that way all the time.

For instance, feeling well has allowed me to dig deeper into the idea of a business plan, because it might be easier to work for myself than it would to work for someone else. However, I’d have to hire the right people around me, because I do not have experience with numbers at all. I could probably get by with QuickBooks, because that will do all the calculations for you, but it’s not the same as having a real accountant. The thing about doing your own books is that you shouldn’t.

I also don’t know much about collaboration in an office, because being neurodivergent makes me miss a lot of “obvious” social clues. All of this is to say that I am a visionary, and I can prove it. That being said, I am not the detail man.

Proving that I’m a visionary has come from testing as INFJ, and a thing we all had to do in the Information Systems department at University of Houston. It was a personality test on your role at work. This always happens to me. I got a role that absolutely no one else did. It’s called “The Plant.” The plant’s job is to throw out ideas, and to take everyone else’s ideas and quickly synthesize that information so that everybody gets what they want. Other people got things like “initiator,” “finisher,” etc. I basically got creative brain power. It’s kind of my thing.

Also, being “The Plant” is easier when you’re AuDHD, because that means you’re already riding a different wavelength than everyone else. This is not always negative. You might miss social cues, but your pattern recognition is not theirs. You can point out problems that other people can’t, which is why I have such a good track record for having ideas for business and no follow-through. Everything about administrating a project is everything with which an autistic person struggles….. and ADHD eats your lunch as well, because you might have a great idea, but who knows how long it will stay in your brain.

It’s why my iPad is so useful to me (as is my Fire Tablet, it just depends on which one is in my bag). If I bring my keyboard to a meeting, I have the ability to write things down as we’re speaking so that good ideas don’t fall through the cracks. It’s the same with writing ideas. I’ll either dictate them into my phone, or add them to my notepad (I use SimpleNote because it’s free and Evernote isn’t….. or at least, it’s not free enough for me to add all my devices. SimpleNote is just as advanced, and open source. KILLER app and you need it.

I think my craziest idea is the biggest undertaking I’ve thought up. It’s a killer idea for an app, but it would take buy-in from a major government agency….. and also it would sell. I just don’t want to let go of it because if I meet an app developer who can bring my idea to fruition, this is something that could help the nation as we expand to other cities.

The most risky thing I could do is open a restaurant, which is a crazy idea in and of itself because first of all, I do not want to be a chef. I would rather be a prep cook, line cook, or dishwasher….. because being a chef sucks so hard. I don’t want to run the show. I just want to participate. My friend Mel is starting a restaurant right now in Norwich, and if I get her permission, I’ll advertise her because I know I have a lot of British fans. She keeps telling me that she’s going to find a way for me to work for her legally, and it’s so sweet whether it happens or not.

She’s also interested in coming to DC, but I think for vacation. Not sure she’s interested in working here, but she’d love Jose Andres. But that’s an idea for long in the future, because right now is the time where you’re holding your breath and waiting for income.

If I had my own restaurant, though, I’d stick to the basics at first, because I know how to elevate the cheap, making food costs lower. That being said, I don’t know how hard it is to get into the restaurant business these days because of the pandemic. I might have more luck with an empty restaurant that only does Uber Eats.

The pandemic fundamentally changed how we order food and groceries, and I think more people are eating at home whether they’re ordering restaurant food or not.

It could be worse. I could want to start a rock band.