This house is just so comforting, and so is David. I like the sounds of him moving about the house as he gets ready to go into the office, but he’s working from home tomorrow. That means I only have one more day this week of walking Jack, and I’m thinking we won’t go very long today. It seems like it’s going to be nasty by that time. Neither one of us particularly like walking in the rain and see it as a necessary evil. I just have to be extra careful because the terrain is not smooth.
My last house was at the intersection of two neighborhood streets. My current house is on a more major road, but there’s a cutout for parking on the street, so you don’t walk down my driveway into traffic. The main road, however, has lots of elevation to it, and it doesn’t matter which way Jack and I walk. It’s uphill. 😉 He likes to sniff everything, which is not unusual for a dog in the slightest. What is unusual is the lengths he’ll go to in order to find the perfect spot. Like, he’s been holding it for 6 or 7 hours…. of course it’s going to take us almost a mile for you to find the perfect place to poop. It’s just a “Jack-ism” to me. I would rather take him on longer walks, anyway. I just have to make sure I have my Bluetooth headphones so that I can hear the directions if we get lost.
The last time I went downtown, I noticed that there’s a huge new sign at the library that says something about it being the new Metro stop for the purple line. I believe the purpose of the purple line on the Maryland side is to connect Silver Spring to Bethesda more directly, riding up Wisconsin Ave…. or as I like to call it, “building a Metro line that goes to Chuy’s.” All Texans need that Metro line.
However, there’s a Chuy’s in Springfield, so I’ve actually been to one in Virginia more recently than I’ve been to the one on Wisconsin Ave. And in fact, I lived here for a long time before I knew they had Chuy’s here. Supergrover read that I went there with my friends, and said that everything we ordered sounded delicious. She did not say that she was already familiar with the restaurant because she’d actually been there. So, I moved here under the impression that Chuy’s was this very unique and special thing, losing my mind when I realized they were building one in Rockville…… because I didn’t know they already had them on the other side of the river.
Mexican food is good, but there’s a special place in my heart for Tex-Mex. Chuy’s has done a good job of expanding. It’s not quite the same food just because the newer restaurants haven’t been cooking the dishes long enough to be able to recreate them perfectly on a consistent basis. Chuy’s on Westheimer and Kirby is an institution in Houston, but I’m not sure that all of the expansion restaurants really have a passion for Tex-Mex. Passion is in very tiny details.
……like remembering to layer sauce into the chicken so that when you unroll or cut into it, all the flavor doesn’t slide off because it was on the tortilla. You can also layer cheese into the chicken as well, but most of the time, enchiladas are either/or. They have meat in them or on them, not both. Cheese enchiladas with chili con carne and some raw Vidalia onion diced on top is heaven…. or if you are in Texas, switch out “Vidalia” for “10/15.”
In case you’re curious, they’re both sweet onions. 10/15 was developed at Texas A&M University and is named for the date the strain was planted. I believe the sugar content on a 10/15 is higher than a Vidalia, but I haven’t lived in Texas in years to be able to compare/contrast.
Speaking of planting, I asked David if he’d plant some lavender for me in the backyard, and he said “sure.” I’m going to look up how to just take a cutting, because I believe that there is lavender in the front yard. I just need the bees to be closer. Apparently, I have object permanence issues.
Speaking of object permanence, I’m surprised I have any at all. The most frustrating part of not having 3D vision is that I can turn my head and when I turn it back, my field of vision has changed. I can no longer see what it was that I just had. Panic rises the longer I can’t find something, because I don’t think “my field of vision has changed, so of course it’s not going to look like it’s in the same spot as it used to be.” I berate myself. I call myself names. I feel bad about calling myself names and try to make myself feel good.
It’s realizing that the tapes that call me stupid for not being able to find something because of my eyes are not internal. They were not created by me. They were created by people waiting on me with impatience. They have no frame of reference for the disability, so lazy and stupid is what they know.
People watch me for a while and it’s a litany of “be careful,” and a look of stern indignation when I’ve spilled something, misplaced something, etc. It is infantilizing quick. I cannot be careful enough to outrun cerebral palsy or the difficulty that comes with having no depth perception and very little peripheral vision….. and when I have it, it’s only in one eye at a time.
It makes me feel anxiety because when I fall, or drop something that spills, etc. I immediately know that someone’s reaction is going to be “I should have been more careful.”
How many times to I have to say that careful has nothing to do with it? I can’t see what I can’t see. If I think a step is a foot tall and it’s 1.5 feet tall, I am not going to lift my leg high enough. I will then fall up the stairs. I am very, very good at this. Well-practiced. No one can make me less clumsy by saying “be careful” more. It’s a lot of weight and anxiety, like my disability is a moral failing.
I’m still not all the way healed from falling after walking Jack the other day. And then I had a second mishap. My bathtub isn’t draining, and I tripped over the rug as I was entering my bathroom. I somehow twisted around and fell into freezing cold water at 0400. David bought new nonslip mats for the bathroom and they’re perfect. The one in front of the bathtub actually says “bath.” It’s so cute.
Nonslip mats are a good start. There are all kinds of accommodations for me out there, but I cannot circumvent everything. It’s just not possible.
I do not have the same observations as everyone else.
Stories That Are All True 