“Comedy equals tragedy plus time.”
I’ve been invited to look at my story as a screwball comedy in terms of a movie. I think it could work, but I’d want it to be in the same vein as “Argo.” There’s too much seriousness in the story to make jokes all the time, but black humor has always been a pressure valve for both of us. If it’s going to have my voice, it’s going to be a “dramedy.”
That’s because there’s too much intrigue and mystery, even for one movie. Our relationship lasted 12 years and contains a historical figure. It has all the makings of your next weirdo favorite.
I was catfished by someone I knew, who used bits of someone else’s story to augment her own… And her accomplishments are large, so part of the mystery is why she felt the need to steal someone else’s story in the first place.
I was charmed by her forceful, no bullshit attitude and the softness she reserved, it seemed, only for me. I’ve been attracted to that my whole life, and her personality swallowed me whole. I think she liked having someone admire her that much, but I cannot tell her story for her. This is only my version of the truth, missing its rightful other side.
I could not see her manipulations while she accused me of manipulating her. I cannot tell you how much this web of lies affected me, the part of my life even I had trouble embracing because it was filled with fear. I can honestly say that I’ve walked through the dark with her, and I have come out on the other side.
Even now, I’m willing to forgive all her lies because it made me a better writer in the end. I got interested in a topic and just ran with it, posting about the intelligence community as if I were a part of it. Michael says that shame and embarrassment shouldn’t take up real estate in my head, so I’m offering that grace to Aada as well.
She is forgiven, utterly and completely. That does not mean that I think I’m the only one that should be examining how things are going psychiatrically and psychologically. She has told me that I was the topic of an emergency therapy session like it was all my fault and I needed help, that I’d spent years manipulating her and she was going to block me on everything and never contact her again.
This worked out for her, because it meant that she would never have to face the music of real conflict in a friendship…. Though it would not surprise me if I heard from her today. I laid down a truth that she wasn’t prepared for me to know a few months ago, and I doubt has made progress on that issue.
I called her on a huge lie, and then mentioned it a few days later. Her reaction was that I could never talk about this lie again because it was so inert. It was so inert that it made me block my favorite author on Facebook and block other people in my life so they’d never question that decision. It was so embarrassing that I could still just cry thinking about it, but I look forward to the day when the screenplay is done.
Lanagan Media Group needs a project to rally around, and this movie might get it done. But it comes at a cost, and that’s possibly hurting two women I adore. I just have to hope that they speak money.
My feelings for Aada, strangely, haven’t changed at their core.
It wasn’t her story. But she was the one that told it.
Stories That Are All True 