I am in the Shennandoah Valley, because yesterday Tiina’s daughter graduated from Virginia Virtual Academy and the ceremony was held at James Madison University. It was a good thing that I decided to come, because Tiina forgot her Rollator. I was able to make her more comfortable by swinging by the farm on the way and it included more than just my presence. It was so cute, because when I walked in the door I could hear Maclaren whimpering for me (or Tiina, or whomever), but I couldn’t let him out safely. So I just talked out loud to him.
I found everything I needed at the farm and arrived in Harrisonburg around 8:45. Tiina was already in bed and I fell asleep 10 or 15 minutes after. Driving all that way was not a small thing, but I was sitting in my house thinking, “when’s the next time Pepper’s going to graduate from high school?” So, how far it was ceased to matter. It was three episodes of “Crime Junkies.”
Please.
Besides, I love to drive with Adaptive Cruise Control. It really allows me to see more of the country when I am not terrified to turn my head. The only thing that’s difficult for me is the hills of Virginia. I am not experienced, but I have a car that’s capable of sport handling and that’s not nothing.
If any of the kids had their driver’s licenses, I would just sit in the passenger seat.
I don’t know how much it would be to add them to my insurance, but it would be worth it never having to drive again.
Because the way you get driven around everywhere is to make it seem exciting. Of course a teen boy wants to take me to Wegmans. Or, at least, that is what I am betting, yes. It is driving in a car that doesn’t look like a Mom car. They would look, dare I say, cool. So if you see me with a teenage boy walking around Wegman’s, you’ll know my plan has succeeded.
The Fusion is perfect for me and the kids because it looks like a cross between a Taurus and a Mustang. Clearly a family vehicle, but with sport trim. I think only the youngest hasn’t ridden with me yet, because I drove everyone minus 10yo from my house in northwest to Fell’s Point. It was the scariest drive of my entire life, because the whole time I was thinking, “be careful with Tiina’s babies.”
But because I am who I am, I’m already thinking about a pickup truck. It doesn’t have to be fancy. I’m not trying to replace the Fusion unless something happens to it. However, the gap that I see is that Tiina and Brian don’t have a truck, so they need a friend with a truck. 😛
In my head, I’ve already picked out the perfect 1989 Nissan Pickup, because that’s something I can teach the boy to work on himself. No computerized anything to get in the way of being a total grease monkey. It’s teaching 16yo the way I learned, with the added benefit that he’s actually capable of lifting the tires, whereas I will have fallen over them three times already.
Nothing has prepared me for life on the farm, because it is so incredibly physical. I can do a lot of jobs, but the ground is uneven and I fall often. I have cerebral palsy, so I move like a drunk before you add physicality on top of it. But I am learning my own ways to contribute, and my favorite thing is bringing the goats weeds. I love cute little goat kisses on my hands. They actually do like to interact with you, so the kisses don’t feel like they’re just grabbing food. It feels like, “thank you so much.”
I haven’t met the pigs yet, but I can’t wait. They are not “proper farm animals” in the sense that we won’t eat them. They are pets, Vietnamese potbellied pigs. I don’t know either of their names, so let’s just say they’re Kevin Bacon and Alexander HAMilton.
But speaking of Hamilton, James Madison is literally my favorite founding brother. Madison displayed behaviors that others would have considered strange and are CLEARLY autistic in retrospect. To be here, on his campus, means something to me in a fundamental way. As far as I know, we are not related.
But we should be- neurodivergents run in packs. Even though he’s no longer living, I’m putting him on my list of friends I talk to that don’t talk back. Reading all of Madison’s work as an undergrad prepared me to understand him, because back then I did not know that my bipolar disorder was also tied to meltdown and burnout. That in a lot of ways, I am confused as to whether I have bipolar disorder or not, because the same drugs work and I cycle too rapidly for bipolar, but autistic meltdown and burnout are always right on schedule.
Therefore, it is great that Tiina, Brian, and I have found each other- three friends who do life together. It feels different to belong somewhere I don’t have to be “on.” That all my quirks are tolerated, including having to tap out because I’m overwhelmed. There’s no pushing through.
WE DON’T DO THAT HERE.
Plus, it’s not a one way street. Neurodivergent people take care of each other, so it’s not unusual for a kid to remind me to take my meds… and vice versa.
So why do I say Pepper’s name?
She is now an adult.
Stories That Are All True 