Now We Are Six

Today is The Divine Mrs. B‘s daughter’s birthday. She’s six, just like Christopher Robin. While she’s enjoying her six-year-old birthday party in Las Vegas, the Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals is going to hear the case for marriage equality. By the time her now six-year-old eyes are closed, we could live in yet another new world.

Now we are six, as well.

That book has always lived in my mind with a sense of occasion. NOW we are six. It is just as important to a six-year-old the kind of world she creates for herself as it is the world we create for her. It is hearing “now we are six” to be reminded that I AM SIX and I know how to use it.

My life’s work is remembering I’ve already passed those milestones and have gone on to create some indelible writings, even if only on my own skin. It’s time for me to take stock of all my “sixness,” and technically, I do it every day. “What do I feel strong about today? What can I get done that will make me feel enormous with self-satisfaction?”

For Ava, it might be cleaning her room or getting an A at school. For me, well, yeah. Kind of the same, really. Except my As aren’t in school. They’re in conduct. 🙂

It is so interesting to me that Ava is six this year, because I kind of had my own “Now We Are Six” moment in August when I published The Cost of Shame; someone told me that they were proud of me and the way I lived my life and it was pulling myself up from my boot straps and hearing the sonic boom of my own words and living through it, breathing so that I could inhale more deeply than I ever could’ve before.

I hope that the Fifth Circuit feels the same way- that they have enough chutzpah to stand up and say that marriage inequality is over, because NOW WE ARE SIX, AMERICA.

We’ve had enough of our own five-year-old moments. Let’s all grow up together.

2 thoughts on “Now We Are Six

  1. I’m caught on “what do I feel strong about today?” Not “what do I feel strongLY about today” which is many many things that inevitably exhaust me, but what do I feel STRONG about today. It’s so rare that we feel strong, because that’s so internal, so individual. Feeling strongly is the noise we make. Feeling strong is the silence.

    Little Miss B is growing up in a scary world where she’s going to need to know how to feel strongly about feeling strong. Scares the hell out of me. Now she is six and is confident about everything. I hope she’s still that confident when she’s my age.



    1. Ohhhh, I don’t think she’ll have a problem. She’s got parents who know to watch out for that- parents who NOTICE when she feels weak and gives her a place to express it. As for you, you are one of the strongest people I know, in both the quiet and gregarious senses.


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