What Happens When You Pray?

So many people ask what happens when we die. Very few ask what happens when we pray. I do not have all of the answers, but I was thinking about my prayer life and I had some thoughts that needed to be verbalized to make them real. I have done it all of my life- before Argo and I ever had our probably million words between us I wrote Diane notes in the back of the class, my first blog entries before I could type. I need all the words I say to be real, or at least as many of them as possible. I don’t keep track of them for you. I go back and read them daily to see if I’m progressing or not.

I mean, I’m glad you enjoy this web site, but the real deal about it is that this blog is my prayer life. I made that connection when Dana and I were talking one day and I said, “one of the reasons that Argo is so sacred to me is that it feels like she gets into my God space. She listens to my thoughts so that when I’m weak and don’t know if God is listening, I know for sure that she is.” Dana looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, “go tell her.” I did, and I’ll never forget that moment her reply landed in my inbox. I literally stared at it for an hour, filled with so much love I could barely stand it.

A compliment with so few words and enormous consequences for who I am and will become…….. “I don’t believe in God. But I do believe in you.”

What happens when you pray? Depends on what you’re asking for. If God answers prayers through human interaction, it doesn’t help you in life to isolate in pain. God is in telling people what is causing you to suffer and giving thanks for those who respond to it. I think Jesus would agree with me on this- I don’t think he would ever lessen a chance to widen the net (because the Disciples were fishers of men, GET IT???). The more you open up about your problems, the more access you have to solutions. The more access you have to options. The more right you feel you have not to live in shame.

I was asking God to change my heart by hoping that I could change before I went out into the world. Using this web site to communicate instead of through speaking allowed me to change while still locked in my office. As the responses came in from my posts, I would sit in amazement as the numbers solidly went up at an enormous rate. People’s responses were and continue to be huge, because when I’m willing to lay out what I need, PEOPLE can hear my voice. It is not me that moves them, but a higher calling to be benevolent of themselves.

As my self-worth has increased, so have the things I pray for. I used to pray for strength. Now I pray for humility. I used to run when people asked me what I thought…… now they run because I tell them. 😉 When I allowed the people of earth to replace the classic “grandfather-in-the-sky” image of God, it changed the archetype for me so that God is literally one body, and there is no way you aren’t a part of it. You can see it with your eyes. God is the struggle of getting different people to believe different things and yet still achieve a common goal. That common goal, the good that came out of all that struggle, is every resurrection story ever told.

In the bulb there is a flower; in the seed, an apple tree;
In cocoons, a hidden promise: butterflies will soon be free!
In the cold and snow of winter there’s a spring that waits to be,
Unrevealed until its season, something God alone can see.

There’s a song in every silence, seeking word and melody;
There’s a dawn in every darkness, bringing hope to you and me.
From the past will come the future; what it holds, a mystery,
Unrevealed until its season, something God alone can see.

In our end is our beginning; in our time, infinity;
In our doubt there is believing; in our life, eternity,
In our death, a resurrection; at the last, a victory,
Unrevealed until its season, something God alone can see.

-Hymn of Promise, Natalie Sleeth

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